With Valentine's Day just around the corner, single men and women tend to become vulnerable as their thoughts turn to finding love if they don’t already have it. Unfortunately, according to Donna Andersen, author of Love Fraud, there are people who don’t care about love, may not even know what love is, and get into relationships for other reasons such as power, control, sex and quite often money.
These people, Andersen says, are called sociopaths. Many of us, due primarily to television, movies and novels, think of sociopaths as deranged killers, but most of them never kill anyone. Andersen says they are however social predators who exploit just about everyone they meet. They have no heart, no conscience and no remorse and they will scam and not love you.
Experts estimate that up to 4% of the population may be sociopaths, depending upon whom you ask. That means there may be as many as 12 million sociopaths in the U.S. alone. What's worse, as adults, it’s believed that sociopathic men and women cannot be rehabilitated.
Andersen learned about sociopaths the hard way -- by marrying one. She says her sociopath husband took $250,000 from her, cheated with at least six women during a two-year marriage, had a child with one of them, and 10 days after Andersen left him, married the mother of the child.
Based on her experience, and the experiences of thousands of others, Andersen has compiled the following list of warning signs that a romantic interest may, in fact, be a sociopath. Here’s what to watch out for:
1. Charisma and charm. They're smooth talkers, always have an answer, never miss a beat. They seem to be very exciting.
2. Enormous ego. They act like the smartest, richest or most successful people around. They may actually come out and tell you that.
3. Overly attentive. They call, text and e-mail constantly. They want to be with you every moment. They resent time you spend with your family and friends.
4. Jekyll and Hyde personality. One minute they love you; the next minute they hate you. Their personality changes like flipping a switch.
5. Blame others. Nothing is ever their fault. They always have an excuse. Someone else causes their problems.
6. Lies and gaps in the story. You ask questions, and the answers are vague. They tell stupid lies. They tell outrageous lies. They lie when they'd make out better telling the truth.
7. Intense eye contact. Call it the predatory stare. If you get a chill down your spine when they look at you, pay attention.
8. Move fast. They quickly proclaim that you're their true love and soul mate. They want to move in together or get married quickly.
9. Pity play. They appeal to your sympathy. They want you to feel sorry for their abusive childhood, psychotic ex, incurable disease or financial setbacks.
10. Sexual magnetism. If you feel intense attraction, if your physical relationship is unbelievable, it may be their excess testosterone.
Now we’re not saying everyone who displays all or some of these traits is a sociopath, but according to Andersen, they could be. It’s up to you to follow your gut now that you have some knowledge about what to look for.
For more information, you can visit: www.Lovefraud.com.